Why Earned Love is Not Unconditional Love
This post will explain how waiting to love yourself until you achieve your goals is creating meaning harmful to your relationship with yourself.
“Earning love is not unconditional love.”
Earning love is not unconditional love.
You want this from your loved ones, but let's check in and see if you’re experiencing that with yourself, first.
When you achieve a big goal, do you love yourself more?
When you perform an act of love for someone else, do you then believe you're more deserving of love?
When you reach a parenting milestone, do you feel more peace and love for your parenting abilities?
If you answered yes, congrats, your love for you is conditional. Now, this is our work.
Let’s dive deeper.
Love based on merit isn’t unconditional love
Because when you don’t reach the big goal, what do you make that mean about you?
Because when you perform that act of love for someone else, and it’s not returned back, what do you make that mean about you?
Because if your kiddo is screaming on the top of their lungs in the checkout line in Target, what do you make that mean about you?
Conditional love is exhausting because you’re always chasing external rewards in order to constantly sustain that temporary FEELING of love.
Unconditional love is loving you no matter what…even when _______happens.
I can show you the way.
Healing self sabotaging behaviors
ABOUT THE AUTHOR I’m Meg Smithson and I remember vividly the heartache, distress, and agony that self sabotaging behaviors caused me. Between eating disorders, anxiety, major self doubt, and constant imbalance, I couldn’t seem to live the fulfilling life I imagined.
If you are currently dealing with this, I get it & know exactly how you feel.
I spent a decade of heartache striving to fit the elusive mold of what mainstream considered “perfect” all while trying to figure out why I was put on this earth.
I learned to listen to what I needed…
…not what others expected of me. Gradually, I felt freedom like I had never imagined I could.
What does a relationship coach do?
Now, I teach women to find that freedom, too, by helping them create the relationship that they really want, faster by first healing their attachment to shame, people pleasing, & perfectionism.
Click to schedule a free consult!
Meg Smithson, Life Coach
Meg coaches women by identifying areas of self sabotage, helping them break up with the shame that usually accompanies that, and then shows them how to set boundaries around the emerging 2.0 version they want to become, and live that life, unapologetically.
Click to schedule a life coaching consultation with Meg.
