Comparison Trap
Our automated response to any sort of “pause” in life is to head to social media and see what’s happening. Social media is the perfect platform to compare our lives against other people’s.
FOMO (fear of missing out) is real.
These short breaks can be when we need a break from work, or when we’re standing in line at the store, or when we’re just super exhausted and don’t want to think anymore. We can also do this, when we’re down, frustrated, exhausted, or in a full mood of despair.
The problem with this is our mentality is now focused on seeing what everyone else is doing, and, making judgements and comparing our lives to those of perfect strangers, our friends, our acquaintances, or social media celebrities we’ve never met.
We start measuring our lives against theirs, most likely without even knowing it. I’ve know I’ve been in a great mood, just scrolling through Instagram, and all of a sudden, I see a person that is just killing the business game, that started at the same time that I did, but is miles ahead of me. Of course I’m proud of her, but I would be lying if I didn’t catch myself comparing where I’m at, to where she’s at.
I’ve learned how to change that mode of thinking ASAP.
It’s a reframe of the brain that wins the comparison race! The big thing to remember, is although we may have started at the same time, that doesn’t mean we live the same life and have encountered the same situations in life as one another. The goal is to be happy for each other, while still aspiring to grow into the highest version of self and achieving all that you envision and more.
This can happen with an array of things to compare yourself to, such as finances and all that she can buy, fashion that she slays, family that she cares for and does so without looking like a hot mess, and even different body types that she rocks.
The amazing thing about this is how easily I can catch myself now, and not allow it to affect me the way it used to. Now, I can be proud of her, realizing she’s growing into the person she’s always dreamed to be and encompassing all that it entails.
Here’s a few things that have helped me catch myself and easily snap out of that comparison trap that we can easily fall into if we’re not armored with strategies to simplify it.
Just because she is doing amazing things in the world, doesn’t mean I’m not too, and that it won’t continue to get better and better with each day that I show up.
Just because she’s becoming more and more successful, doesn’t mean there’s not enough room in the success boat for me too. Success doesn’t have a fixed amount of space for all to encompass.
Just because she’s at a level that I admire, doesn’t mean that I won’t be at a level one day (or am not already at one) where others admire me as well, but in my own unique niche.
This list could go on and on. The point is, to catch yourself comparing yourself to someone else, and then start going over in your head (or aloud) exactly what I just did.
You are amazing right now and can simultaneously do amazing things in this world too.
Success doesn’t have a fixed amount. There’s room for you there too as long as you keep showing up.
Admire the levels of others, as long as it’s encouraging you. If it’s not, take a hiatus from checking out what others are doing for a week at a time, and keep working at reminding you there’s more than enough success out there in the world for you as well.
Slay Self Sabotage & Style Your Success,
Meg